New Zealand Heavy Metal Forum & Discussion

[Obzen]

*edit*

[Obzen]

quite possibly the shittest idea yet

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

^^^100 points for that post!

[Rob]

contradiction is the key to personal/self growth.

+99 i dont think ill give anyone 100 . hah
i dont even know why im replying or talking here. wtf is this thread about?

oh yeah points. i get it. the point

so u want to point out the points. do u get points for pointing out points cause there still points right? u have to point a point. thats weird
reminds me of the devin townsend quote. "suck a shit to a point and stab yourself with it"

[Obzen]

this is as shit as a thread is allowed to be without getting deleted
the bar has been set

[weblord pepe]

What do you call a laughing black guy?


...snigger!


Ok maybe not appropriate for all audiences.

What do you call a guy who died of bum cancer?

...Colin!

What do you call a guy who died from lung cancer?
Coffin!

..bonus points if your fart is loud enough to wake up the cat

[Death]

Whats got 2 legs and bleeds?

Half a sheep

[Dead Kid]

Why shouldn't you go to the Ukraine wearing only boxers?
Chernobyl fallout.

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

What was the last advice Earl Woods gave to Tiger on his death bed?

Concentrate on Golf 100% and fuck everything else!

[Death]

I think we should re name this thread to pointLESS

[Rob]

Why shouldn't you go to the Ukraine wearing only boxers?
Chernobyl fallout.

thats punny,
fuck the points.

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

The Bacon Tree

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says.........

"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk."

"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "

With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.

There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon .... every imaginable kind of cured pork.

"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."

"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."

"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."

And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,

"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"

"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "

"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees


Ees


Ees


Ees



Ees a ham bush....."

[Obzen]

aww man, that punchline hurt my feelings

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

sorry guido

[Rob]

that was a nice joke actually heard it before.
did u type up that version? i like it .

[Obzen]

www.google.com

define: guido

"Guido" (or "Gino") is a slang term for a younger lower class or working class urban Italian-American. The Guido stereotype is often portrayed as humorously thuggish with an overtly macho attitude and an unyielding pride in his Italian ancestry.

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

i'm confusing my racial slurs!

[Death]

http://www.shutupwomangetonmyhorse.com/

[Dead Kid]

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He had to work out his logs with a slide rule.

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

i heard he worked it out with a pencil

[The Mighty Jazrodian]

What did princess Diana die from?












































Carpool Tunnel Syndrome...

[George]

Premature ejaculation party at my place this weekend, no dress code, just come in ya pants!!

[Burning Beard]

What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?


He wiped his arse.

[Obzen]

What did princess Diana die from?












































Carpool Tunnel Syndrome...

Its all in the timing

[Death]

whatd the fish say when he swam into a concrete wall?

dam

(hardy ha ha) o_O